I'm Gonna Miss This

A friend of mine recently considered renaming their family blog and I started thinking about what some possible alternative names for my blog would be (not that I plan on changing it.) I thought about things like "My Really Rambunctious Boys" or "Brothers and Best Friends." Then I thought about a song I heard the other day and came up with "Things I'm Gonna Miss." The song is "You're Gonna Miss This" by Trace Adkins and here are the lyrics:

She was staring out the window
Of their SUV
Complaining, saying,
I cant wait to turn 18
She said, "I'll make my own money"
And I'll make my own rules"
Mama put the car in park
Out there in front of the school
And she kissed her head
And said 'I was just like you'

"You're going to miss this
You're going to want this back
You're going to wish these days
Hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're going to miss this

Before she knows it
She's a brand new bride
In her one bedroom apartment
And her daddy stops by
He tells her "It's a nice place"
She says "It'll do for now"
Starts talking about babies
And buying a house
Daddy shakes his head
And says "Baby just slow down"

Cause You're going to miss this
You're going to want this back
You're going to wish these days
Hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're going to miss this

Five years later
There's a plumber
Working on the water heater
Dogs barking, phones ringing
One kids crying, one kids screaming
She keeps apologizing
He says "They don't bother me.
I've got two babies of my own.
One's 36, one's 23.
It's hard to believe..."

But You're going to miss this
You're going to want this back
You're going to wish these days
Hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're going to miss this
You're going to miss this
Yeah you're going to miss this.

I get a little misty eyed each time I hear it because my boys are growing up so fast. I once heard a quote referring to this season of life which says "The days are long but the years are short." It's so true. As I look back over my first year's worth of posts I'm blown away by how much the boys have changed.

I read an article years ago in my pre-mommy days about a mom who was wishing she could have a "Book of Lasts." She said that she has been very diligent in writing down her child's first everything - tooth, word, haircut - but lamented that she couldn't record the last time certain things happened because you never know when it's gonna happen. Things just change and you only realize in retrospect that they are gone - like the last time they drink from a sippy cup or let you dry them off after a bath or reach their arms up to be picked up or need you to tie their shoe. I remember getting a little sentimental about the article long ago I'm sure I would absolutely bawl my eyes out if I were to read it now. In three and half short years we've gone from babyhood to brotherhood to toddlerhood to having two preschoolers. My boys don't do any "baby" things now. Gratefully, I do still have a few more nights of holding them in my lap to read nite-nite books then laying them in their cribs but it is all passing slowly away. It's okay though. I don't want to hold them back - not really.

I saw a Zits cartoon once where the teenage son was going to be out of the house for a weekend and the mom and dad were sitting on the couch thinking about what it would be like in a couple of years when he was out of the house for good. The mom said "What do you call that emotion right between can't-stand-to-see-them-leave and can't-wait-for-them-to-go?" The dad answered "Parenthood."

I'm excited to watch my sons grow and learn and become more independent and confident and self-sufficient each day and at the same time I'm a little sad to think that they are needing me a little less each day (in some ways). One of my favorite mothering quotes comes from one of my weekly MOPS emails last fall. It is by Dorothy Canfield Fisher and it says "A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary. " Wow, what an awesome responsibility. Over the next two decades I'm supposed to in effect work myself out of a job.

I'm really okay with that (at least that's what I tell myself) because I think being an empty-nester with my best friend still by my side will be a pretty cool deal. I just vow right now to just treasure each moment my sons still call me "Mommy" and want to read books in my lap and these days when their shoes look so small next to mine.
I apologize for the sappiness of this post. I'm usually not too terribly sentimental. You can blame this recent bout of sentimentality on my blogiversary, or Mother's Day, or my two sons who are growing up way too fast. I'll try to be more upbeat in my next post.